Parker Movie Reviews

Parker

Parker

Release Date: Jan 25, 2013

Genre: Suspense/Thriller

Rating: (R)

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User reviews on Parker

  • 2
    I love action films and I enjoy watching these films on the big screen and I was kind of excited about this film, however I was disappointed with it. The film seemed rushed and it felt like nobody really cared about it and it really showed. The film had no thrills, no intrigue but plenty of dead bodies. Satham plays the same role yet again and he seems to be on auto-pilot in this film, I was so bored watching his performance. Lopez character is completely ridiculous and her acting skills match it, it was painful to watch her. Overall, i recommend skipping this film and seeing something that is worth your time and money.
  • 2
    I did not like this film and I do not recommend seeing it in the theaters. I do have to say that I am not a fan of action films but my friend dragged me to see this one and it reaffirmed my dislike for this genre. The film is extremely predictable, boring, it has no passion, no thrills but plenty of blood and dead bodies just for the sake of it. Statham plays the same role again, I would love to see him in a different genre film, he really needs to change things up. Lopez is absolutely horrible in this film and her character has a lot to do with it (also her acting skills have not improved over the years at all). Overall, this film was not good at all and i think it would be a waste of your time and money if you decided to see it.
  • 3
    Eh, this one is strictly ok. I didn't see anything in it I haven't seen in a million other revenge action flicks so I wouldn't say it's novel, but then it's not terrible either. It has some fun moments, especially when Nick Nolte and Michael Chiklis show up to flex some muscle. One thing I did not understand is now the villains in this movie can be so dumb as to not know that Parker is Parker just because he disguises himself while wearing a hat and a mustache. Really? I was confused by that. It was a big hole in the plot. The only female in the story is Jennifer Lopez's character - she's down on her luck and she thinks that hooking up with Parker will help her make some much needed money. Jennifer Lopez needs to catch a break when it comes to her movie choices. She doesn't seem to get any decent parts anymore - and all the good latina roles go to Salma Hayek and Penelope Cruz. She should play something more substantial than just the hot lady.
  • 4
    I saw the trailer for this and I thought it looked interesting so I figured I would give it a peek, and I think it was worth it. This is definitely not in the league of James Bond or Jason Bourne, but it's still pretty watchable as far as action flicks go. Jason Statham plays the lead character Parker who is a hero but a bad guy at the same time. He does what he wants how he wants to and doesn't ask questions. Nobody had better cross his path, especially the bad guys led by Michael Chiklis from that awesome show on FX (what was it called??). The action sequences in this movie are pretty spectacular. The movie also has some sweet rides that the heroes use to get from shoot out to shoot out. Jennifer Lopez looks smokin' in her attire though she might be getting too old to play the bombshell part. I think the movie should get a sequel..if it's a hit, we'll see, I guess.
  • 2
    May God strike me down if I ever decide to venture into a Jennifer Loez movie again. I mean, can anyone give me a breakdown of what she was thinking when she signed this? She is no longer a viable movie star, she's just a TV actress who should stick to judging reality shows. The last good thing she did was what . . . her two episode stint on "Will & Grace" where she played herself?! Oh how the mighty from the Bronx have fallen.
    Jason Statham and Nick Nolte are decent in their parts, but their acting cannot save the movie from itself, especially with the two of them going at it like mad bucks who don't know what's going on or why they hate each other. It's something like an episode of Planet Earth, except that one was beautiful to look at. Michael Chiklis is also good in this, though he just has to stare at the camera and he gets the job done. He really plays bad very well.
  • 2
    I might sound like I'm coming down too hard on her, but seriously...Jennifer Lopez, what has become of you??! This is hands down the worst movie she's ever done, and I have seen her mega bombs like What to Expect When You're Expecting and The Back Up Plan. And who can forget the ultra disastrous An Unfinished Life and the greatest bomb of all time, Gigli. Seriously J Lo: what has happened to you? Like you, I have two kids, but unlike you I have been able to retain some semblance of dignity which you obviously have not. Otherwise, how can you possibly explain all the embarrassing butt shots in this movie of what used to be the most famous curves in the world (those now belong to Kim Kardashian). I think I counted at least 16 shots of J.Lo's butt, which seems totally gratuitous and insulting to any woman, especially one who is a mother and who is supposed to be a role model to younger kids. Maybe it's time for her to retire??
  • 3
    I used to love Donald Westlake books when I was a teen. I read and reread so many of his stories that I could recite some of them by heart by the time I had reached college. The main character Parker in his stories is just a bad ass. He totally knows how to rock the casbah, so to speak, especially when it comes to the bad guys who he wants to avenge for doing bad deeds that only happen in the best fiction stories. I think that the director might have done better if he had just stuck to one story that Westlake had written rather than the entire series which he story of distills into a watered down mishmash of plots that really aren't that interesting. The main actor Jason Statham has done a million of these roles and he seems content to just sleepwalk his way through this one. Sometimes that works, sometimes it doesn't. I think this would probably work better as a TV show or miniseries.
  • 2
    For diehard fans of Donald E. Westlake, my apologies: I have never, ever read or heard of anything written by the deceased writer. Lest I offend any of his most devoted readers, I must confess that after seeing the filmed version of his beloved crime novels, I am kind of glad that he is dead. For his sake, that is. Because this is one terrible movie.

    Things get so jacked up so quickly and thoroughly in Parker that to even attempt to list even a tenth of them would take about an hour. Let’s just put it this way: any action movie in which the hero is forced to wear a handlebar mustache and a ten gallon cowboy hat as a method of actual deception that isn’t meant to be ironic or clever is a joke. And a mirthless, laughless joke at that.

    Sadly, that’s what we get in this movie: a man out for revenge who thinks that gangs of bad guys can be outwitted with mustaches that look like they were leftover from The Carol Burnett Show. Erm, ok.

    And then there’s Jennifer Lopez. Even after sitting through all 118 minutes of Parker, I have literally no idea what she was doing or saying throughout any of it. She’s supposed to be a reluctant bad lady who signs on to make some quick cash, but there are so many from-the-back butt shots of J.Lo you have to wonder if her bum was stipulated more appearances than her face in her contract. It’s a sad, sexist fall from (something like) grace for what was once a promising career.

    She never quite recovered from Gigli. It’s been bomb after bomb for Jenny from the Block ever since. Remember The Back-Up Plan? What To Expect When You’re Expecting? My advice: get a Spanglish si. coon NBC or stick to judging reality shows. We really can’t take anymore of her film career.

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